it is well with my soul...almost.

remember last spring when i was job searching like mad?

i came so close so many times and just faced a lot of disappointment?

here we go again.

the position i applied for at the seminary, the part time one that i head everyone was so excited i had applied for, including the boss and the people in HR, the one that would have gone perfectly with my schedule out of here and into part-time ministry. that one.

crushed before my very eyes today as they walked the new employee through my office to introduce them to everyone.

I didn't even know they had started interviewing.

if i can't get a job here, it's ok.

if God has a different plan, it's ok.

but i hate getting my hopes up. i hate it when people don't communicate with me so that i'm lead to believe a completely different thing that what is actually happening.

i hate feeling foolish.

so i'm calling in the use of the pouty face today.

i promise not to rock it too long - because i'm pumped to see what else is on the horizon. but now i've got a lot on my brain until india. and i'm trying to face the reality that i probably wont get to stay here at gcts anymore. so i'm gonna work the pouty face just for today.

back on the horse soon, i promise.

also - turn on the "enter the worship circle" station on pandora.

every single song is speaking right to my heart right now.

much needed.